_{^{When you ask somebody to do a favor for you, lock your eyes onto their face, and see if you see any hint of them not wanting to do it.  Yea they may say "sure" but if you look deep into their face you can see the "hell nah."  Let's say you say "Kelly, you think you can bring to the post office, then bring me home?"  Right when you say the words "post office" lock into their face and see if you see a slight roll of the eyes or you may see a nostril flare up or they may let out a small breath, but if you take your eyes off the middle of their face you will miss it.  If you don't see it, then that is a good person and they are happy to bring you, if you do see it, then ask somebody else, their is no sense in having somebody do something for you that doesn't want to do it.}}

_{^{You know what game I hate, I hate the "I was just seeing what you were going to say" game.  What the f*ck kinda sh*t is this?  You say some bullsh*t, see what the person says, then say you was just playing?  You can really get ya feelings hurt playing sh*t like this.  She be talking with her girls and sh*t and one of her girls will say "test him to see if he loves you unconditionally"  She be like ok, so when she see him, she will say "baby, I have herpes." and he will say "you little f*ckin whore, I knew something was wrong with ya p*ssy, so that's probably where that f*ckin smell be coming from, that explains that sh*t, p*ssy smelling like fried bear d*ck, ya see, that's why I been f*ckin ya sister, cause I just can't stand the smell of your p*ssy."  Then she like "baby, I was just playin, just wanted to see what you was going to say."}}

_{^{Once you hit a certain age, you aint got to be sick to die.  Just because your grandmother or grandfather is not sick, doesn't mean that they can't pass away tonight (knocking on wood furiously).  You should be calling your grandparents everyday just to see how they are doing.  Even if it's just for 2 minutes.  F*ck it, give them a call, hear their voice, say I love you, and hang up. 2 minutes.  When somebody is gone, everybody be wishing they would of did this and should of done that,  there are 1440 minutes in a day, your grandparents can't get 2?  Trust me yo, 2 minutes everyday will make them love you to death.}}

_{^{You ever see a b*tch you went to school with stripping in a strip club?  I did, we walked in, she was on stage, she seen us, she halled azz off stage into the bathroom and didn't come out again, she ran off just like "Diamond" did in Playas Club.  Gotta be some embarrassing sh*t.  She was smart in school too, she was like one of those A students and sh*t.  I don't know how the f*ck she ended up in the strip club, she made a left turn on red without her signal light somewhere down the road that put her in the mutha f*ckin strip club.  She had a nice azz car though, so I don't know maybe she always wanted to be a stripper.  Some chicks have dreams like that when they be younger yo, they be wanting to be porn stars and strippers on the low, they don't never tell anybody but some chicks have slut goals and aspirations.}}

_{^{Do you keep your cell phone.................. VOTE NOW}}